Norwich City v Huddersfield Town
The Sky Bet Championship
Tuesday August 16th - 19:45 ko
at Carrow Road

Old McGalphsmiths Farm
By the stream that was the River Colne
Turn right at the roadworks on Leeds Road
Unless your going the other way
So then turn left.

Kick-off 15:00 UK Time
Saturday 13/08/22

Now there's a novelty, 3pm kick-off on a Saturday afternoon just as the pubs are getting full. Do you think it will catch on? Should we petition the EFL for more games to start at this time or should we stick to Friday nights where you've a chance of missing your last bus home or Sunday afternoons and get home to a ruined Sunday dinner? Or one that's been kept warm for you - in the dog? Or do you prefer Saturday lunch time just as the pubs are opening? I would put this to the vote but it's a bit of a faff tbh.

Whether the Weather

It's gonna be a hot 'un.
This could be a game of 4 quarters or 6 thirds, depending on how often they stop for a cold 'un.
Don't bank on catching that 5 o'clock train (if it's even running) or bus.

Wading through the canal at Red Doles or the River/Stream Colne (what's left of it) before taking your seat might be advised.
The sinks in the toilets at the McGalphsmiths are not big enough to bath or shower in.
The pitch soakers used before the game and at half-time are, I'm reliably informed, er, refreshing but you might get arrested for running onto the pitch.
You have been warned.

Otherwise a word of advice from our sponsor

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVQeP5vRP5E

I'd like to wish everyone a happy new season but that's not exactly working out as hoped so far either is it?

That said, Forest only had 1 point after 7 games last season. Wonder what happened to them?
Admittedly they had a more expensively and (on paper) far better squad at this time last season than we've got right now.
It just took them about ooh, 20-odd seasons to find the right bloke to unlock the potential.

I'm told we need lots of patience, but I'm also told there's lots of them up the Infirmary that can't get treatment in A&E.
(b'dum, tisch). I'm here all week.

We welcome the lads from Smoke-on-Stench to the banks of the River Colne, where the water levels should now be low enough to make the recovery of rusty bikes, mangled supermarket trolleys and dead dogs a lot easier than it was at the end of last season when it was pissing it down with rain for fun.



Rain? - remember that? Oooooh, it was soooooo cool. Bloody freezing if I remember rightly.

Pre-match Pre-amble - or Rant

As most of my potential script for this match was being nobbled in the Preston post match discussion right before my eyes, (thanks boys and girls ) I don't think there's much point in going into the detail I was once considering.
That and I decided I was chewing off far more than I could post.

That said, here's some of my two-pennorth on what I've seen, heard and read so far.
Yes it's a rant, not a long one, but it's a rant. Feel free to move to the next section at your leisure.

In my opinion, despite promises to the contrary, or the bullshit written by the bloke in The Daily Mail who also got it wrong about ownership contracts being signed and handed over at Wembley, depending on which story you want to believe, Deano was happy to let LO'B and Toffo leave for what is rumoured to be less than LO'B's buy-out clause and certainly no more than we turned L666s down for last year. Deano has shown little inclination to reinvest that in a ready to go permanent replacement (as yet).

The other big miss is Colwill at the back, that's a fact, not my opinion.

Back to my opinion.
Having worked with sows ears for one season and managing to keep us up, Corberan got far more out of the squad than the sum of individual talents last season, helped by the much improved defensive line-up. The recruitment team (not Corberan though he eventually had a say) took great joy in being congratulated for that achievement. Whilst they weren't sows ears anymore, he really turned them into a silk purse. Had fans been in the stadiums in that first season, would he even have even been around, or sacked before the end of that first season? There were more than a few (holds up his hand) on this forum let alone the others that were questioning whey he was here.

What he saw coming this season, but a bit late for some of us (yes you Snoots) for their liking, was the expectation to do the same again but unfortunately with another load of sows ears. Don't blame him one bit for jumping ship and unfortunately, one of our own, Danny, has been given the shitty end of the stick. The recruitment department has been remarkably quiet on its (lack of) achievements so far, given the head of recruitment and our Chairlump together are also responsible for selling players for less than market value.

We've gone from a highly motivated squad where players could look round the dressing room and say, yeah, we can make this work, to one where the recruitment and reinvestment has been less than stellar (so far) and the players look at each other and go, nah, it's not gonna work like last season. From the two games I've attended, some of them aren't obviously putting the work in they obviously did last season either. Did Lewis really do all the running for everyone else?

With Pearson being injured, Lees is now covering for the replacements at the back as they aren't up to speed yet (and won't be) until Pearson at least returns and it isn't working.

So, as we keep getting told by our recruitment team, we try to bring in "better than we've got".
I'll buy into Tino coming back - the version we saw come on at Coventry last season has been the same version that has come on as a sub this season, but he wasn't really as effective when starting at Brum.

With an absence of the main one of the usual two man wrecking team, we've a midfield that is letting the opposition pass through them at will, a defence that is pulled everywhere as a result, shots are raining in on Nicholls and with the best will in the world, he can't stop all of them. I'd like to hope that Rudoni turns into another gem from being a rough diamond, but it's a big ask to step up in this atmosphere at the moment. I liked what I saw of him at Brum, he just had nobody to cross to or help him when he was 2 or 3 man marked most of the time.

Am I giving the forwards an easy ride? Well no. Ward took his goal well at Brum but has developed that "first touch of a stainless steel door" ability again, I question whether Koroma wants to be a footballer, let alone be here right now and Sorba The Taff's runs, passes and dead ball deliveries are way below his high standard of last season, so far.

Apart from that, everything in the garden is just rosy - well, it smells of the stuff you might put on your roses.

I applaud Danny Schofield for standing up to post-match scrutiny so far, with a lot of dignity and also for keeping Ryan Schofield away from the Preston match squad. Had he been in goal for that hammering (even as a sub, if he'd have had to come on) it would have finished his career in the eyes of the Town fans that look for easy scapegoats, and god knows we've loads of those hanging around the club. Corberan would more than likely have picked him, just remember that.

Your opinions are welcome, whether it's on my opinions or not. Rant over.

On the tellybox

Not showing anywhere (legally) at the moment that I can find, other than iPlayer commentary, maybe, and Radio Local. Good luck if you aren't at the ground.

Latest news

Colin Wanker is apparently going to be allowed to put his two-penn'orth in at half-time. What could possibly go wrong?
I'd rather he was doing the broomstick challenge to be honest. That really would be worth missing the long q's for pies and pees at half-time for. 

This sneeked in while doing my refining edits - Kayne Kesler-Hayden signs on loan
Spotted AmChaff's post a bit late and may make part of my rant look silly - I'll stand by what I've said as I'm no fortune teller.

Out Injured/Suspended/Isolating

Not aware of anyone other than Pearson and Kasumu

Back training but not oven ready/Back in the frame

Most of the squad's performing like they aren't oven ready, unfortunately. They'll be playing in an oven like temperature on Saturday so just standing around will result in being burned to a crisp.

Last time out

For those with a really short memory, we lost 1-4 at home to Both Ends in the EFL Cup. Having reach the dizzy heights of Round 2, only to lose to those cheating Scouse b'stards Everton last season, hopes were high when we got a home game against a fellow Championship side that we'd last at least another 90 minutes, well certainly for more than 6 minutes anyway, before we waved the white flag in this season's comp.



Stoke played out another full 90 minutes without scoring again away from home on their 2nd attempt this season. On this occasion they didn't concede either, so it went to penalties. Sadly the 3 they converted weren't enough as Morecambe netted 5 of theirs to go through. They started with a 2-0 loss at Millwall, a 2-0 home win against Blackpool prior to this.



Last season they set off like a house on fire, or certainly smouldering profusely, and were in and around the Top 6 for the first half of the season. Then a few injuries kicked in in the New Year and the inconsistent Stoke we know and love came back into view as they slowly but surely dropped to mid-table obscurity, finishing 14th eventually.



The Sack Race

All's quiet on the western front at the moment, but even if poor Danny's odds are shortening on him at a rate of knots, let's not be too hasty and go in desperation looking for the football ugliness that is Dycheball, as is already being suggested by some elsewhere, or even Colin Wankerball, just because he's in the building this Saturday.

The 3 hot favourites from that lot upstairs at the moment are Frank Lampard (shurely that was lasht sheashon?), Ralph Hasenhuttl and a certain Mr. Steven Gerrard. Out of our league on wages? Maybe, maybe not. At least two of them have already banked enough brass from playing to not need to work again and the TV money for us is still far higher in The Chumpionship than League 1. Whether they'd jump back into the fire quickly if thrown out of the frying pan is another matter.

Innies and Outies

For the benefit of those looking in from the outside, I'll do both teams.

For Town I covered a chunk of this in my opening rant. For whatever reason (I've looked on 3 websites) Sinani and Colwill are listed on last seasons moves.

Town

Inward


Outward


Stoke



I've checked a couple of times and I'm pretty sure their squad is now devoid of former Town players (certainly of recent times).
Benik (wandering minstrel) Afobe has signed at Millwall. If he ever played for Stoke it can't have been enough times to get his kit dirty. Smiffy has rocked up at Boro and Tom Ince has turned his loan move at Reading into a full blown father and son reunion.

Dwight Gayle was a source of much speculation as to where he might end up after leaving Newcastle. Well be turned up on the bonny, bonny banks of the Trent & Mersey canal.



Who's banging 'em in

It's a bit twerly for this but Jacob Brown (last seasons top scorer) and Harry Clark scored their goals against Blackpool.

Musical Interlude

Spreading the wings a little to include Staffordshire this time, well, for a few of them

Although the band was formed in Stafford, The Climax Blues Band was originally called The Climax Chicago Blues Band. The group was established in 1967. It featured Colin Cooper as vocalist and harmonica player, Pete Haycock as vocalist and guitarist, Derek Holt as the guitarist, Richard Jones as keyboardist and bassist, and George Newsome as the drummer.
They might have had Town in mind when they released this one, even way back in 1976.



If you were raving in the 1990s, you’re sure to remember the mightily influential rave duo Altern-8, who were known for their loud electronic songs with heavy-basslines. Mark Archer and Chris Peat, both from Stafford, were already successful artists with their techno group Nexus 21, which had formed in 1989. In 1990, they began Altern-8 as a side project and it turned out to be even more successful than their other band.



Other tracks included E-Vapor-8 and Hypnotic St-8 but I've not found one titled Rote-8, yet.

Formed in Stafford in 1989, Bizarre Inc. was a dance-pop and house band that got people moving on their feet to legendary tracks like Playing with Knives and I’m Gonna Let You. The latter reached number three in the UK singles chart, and it was number one in the US. And Bizarre Inc. scored another US number one with their hit Took My Love. The band was formed by Dean Meredith and Altern-8’s Mark Archer.



Yeah I know, not really my music, but I can live with it. Here to entertain first, educate 2nd, and hope Town win 3rd. Well, in this segment.

You know me, can't keep away from it, so there's this bloke from Stoke, Saul Hudson, learned to play the geetar and wandered off to the the mighty USofA, leaving the bright lights of Smoke-on-Stench behind 'im. Met up with a band looking for a lead geetarist, they became Gun's N' Roses, he might be better know to you as Slash. The rest as they say ... leads you to Paradise City.




They can't all lose

Pick your runners and riders from this lot.



We've played 'em before

The Smokies are a bit in front on this one.



Next up?

Town are at Norwich on Tuesday and at Coventry next Saturday.
Ever the optimist, I've booked my ticket for Coventry. 
Somehow think we might not have quite as many there this season as last though. 

Pressers



If you'd prefer the read, click here for the Unexamined short version

The view from the Potters wheel

Harry Potter er, that O'Neill fella doesn't get out of bed anywhere near as early as Danny for his pressers, been waiting all bloody day for him to get this done.

https://www.stokesentinel.co.uk/sport/fo...ld-7434713




And remember - don't light a BBQ this weekend just because you can if it might burn half the neighbourhood (or most of the Yorkshire moors) down.
Then again, maybe you've got a neighbour or two from hell who, er ....... just saying.