[Washington]

I'll have a tetleys and leave it up to you to decide if that's tea or beer

must be **** hard in 'murrica. Shit bacon, shit sausages, shit bread, shit chocolate, shit sweets, shit football

You need to get out here, then you would see that most of that sentence is a little wrong!!!  Bacon is different, not shit but not great for a bacon sandwich.  Bread is good as long as you stay away from cheap white sliced, they have far more artisan breads here than you do.  Sausages I will give you, some are good but the variety is poor!!  Chocolate and "candy" is good as well, just a bit different from ours, but English sweets are fairly easy to get hold of now so get to have best of both worlds!!  And you know my feelings on Football!!

I am sure Washington will agree, but the burgers over here are excellent, much better than the UK, as is the steak, but their pies are crap!!!

There's a good place in Redmond near Microsoft - 3 lions pub with the British pantry and a restaurant attached. The pub shows soccer and has a ridiculous amount of imported beer along with PNW craft brews the pantry sells imported t bags, chocolate, HP etc and take make excellent pork pies, sausage rolls and pies and pasties. Always stop by when on the way to visit my eldest daughter up in Bellingham. From there we sometimes pop over the border to B Columbia for decent fish and chips and curries.