25-07-2017, 16:47
The tennis is over as is the cycling, we went on a nature ramble with Jordan Spieth, the Derby was ages ago, we have had a couple of test matches and a one day international competition we managed to cock up in, television has been dreadful apart from the Foo Fighters at Glastonbury and we had a 12 year election campaign. Something has been sadly missing this summer a football tournament but a week on Friday it all starts again, nine months of ups and downs across many bedrooms in Britain but far better than sex football is back.
All those exotic venues from Grimsby to Swindon hopes and expectations will rise and be dashed once again has only a handful of clubs can actually win anything as for others they will exit through the trap doors and for the rest who knows.
There will be long nights on the road were the signpost 13.7 miles to the end of the roadworks between Sandbach and Keele is always a sign to dread after you've lost a night game at Cardiff.
Plenty of beer and food will be consumed, bucket loads of money will be spent, why? because we enjoy it.
Anyway here's my irrelevant guide to this years Championship it will include a bit of piss taking, for those easily offended, tough titty.
First up
ASTON VILLA
Interesting tweet from their chairman Dr Xia this summer saying he thought the Championship last year was a poor division, they sent neigh on 40 million being mid table cannon fooder in a poor division, says a lot about Villa last season.
They have spent a bit again this season mainly employing Wayne Bridge's best mate John Terry, have also signed Chris Samba, so if those two play any ball over the top will cause them utmost problems.
Glenn Whelan also signed, they have a lot of serious ability in their squad depends on whether Brucie can get them going. Interesting to see if Ross McCormack can get over his garden wall.
Anything short of promotion for this lot a disaster.
BARNSLEY
Second season for the Tykes at this level, also having sold Winnall and Houahane, may find this season a bit of a struggle, no major signings Isgrove from Southampton and one of the thousands of lads Chelsea send out on loan Ike Ugbo sem to be the only arrivals.
Cannot see anything but a relegation fight for these guys may have to rely on Michael Parkinson and Dickie Bird to keep them up.
BIRMINGHAM CITY
Wheeler Dealer Honest Arry will be working his magic with the players this close season at St Andrew's rumoured to be after thousands of players including Hugill from North End (put up or shut up Harry mate) also been lined with the likes of Robbie Keane, Ashley Cole and Keith Downing, suspect Arry won't be happy until he signs Sandro or Nico thingy from Rangers after all he always does sign these players.
Absolutely zilch chance of going up but that won't tax Arry, nothing taxes Arry.
BOLTON WANDERERS
A season of struggle awaits the newly promoted Wanderers, one thing is certain that a wind up order is usually only a day or two away for the club based these days in a retail park in Horwich.
Parkinson will make them hard to beat although most sides probably will do, staying up will be a bonus for the Trotters, being in existance and paying wages at the end of the season will be considered an achievement by the board.
BRENTFORD
Think this is their last season at Griffin Park, seem to be spending money as if it's going out of fashion, paid £1.8 million for Exeter's Ollie Watkins and seem to be lobbing money at foreign imports as well. All players bought by the Bees are signed due to performance statistics. Decent manager in Dean Smith they could end up anywhere in the league except in the top six.
BRISTOL CITY
Spending a fortune on unknown French players again, had a season of struggle last year only puklled their seasion around after a hammering at Deepdale, lost their best loanee in Tammy Abraham but mini Johnson has some decent contacts suspect they will end up with another super youngster from Chelsea. Usually win at Ashton Gate under Grayson but as he's left that could complicate matters. Play this lot on a Tuesday night at the Gate so looking forward to it.
BURTON ALBION
Staying up last season was an achievement for the smallest club in the Championship, if thgey do it again Clough can be considered to be a miracle worker.
They have signed Ross County's leading scorer Liam Boyce, also have taken Luke Murphy on loan from Leeds again, exceedingly well run club, second season syndrome may make it harder for them suspect they will go down if they don't then fair play to them.
CARDIFF CITY
Colin's side will be hard to beat next season, I like Warnock says what he thinks, never ponever plays what you could say was an attractive style of football quite attritional at times. Rock up there on 30/12/2017 for our traditional defeat, mid table for these lads this season.
DERBY COUNTY
Question is will the owner sack Rowett after failing to beat North End in a home match as has hhappened in the last two seasons, will soon find out as we play them at the Ipro on the second Tuesday of the season. They have signed Tom Huddlestone who will be useful at this level. Should do better with the players they have but somehow always seem to fade towards at the end of the season, will go close but not close enough.
FULHAM
Will be there or there abouts at the end of the season, probably disappointed they didn't go up last season as by far one of the best sides I saw. Play excellent football and have some talented footballers including a 16 year old full back Sessegnon. They beat North End three times last season which tells you how good they are.
Always a good trip to the Cottage irrespective of the result.
HULL CITY
A bold managerial appointment by the City board appointing a Russian as manager, however does beg the question what does he know about the Championship. Suspect there won't be many singing Slutky's amber and black army around the K Com this season. Not sure whether the owner or the fans are on friendly terms, may not be a season of happiness next to the Humber.
IPSWICH TOWN
Big Mick had a struggle last season and cannot se it getting any better this season, he has signed Garner from Rangers which will mean the number of head injuries in the East Anglian area will increase by 900% as Joey boy will fall to the turf at the merest whiff of contact. Joey boy will not score many at this level but he will annoy loads. Tough season for Big Mick don't think he will end the season at Portman Road. Town possibly involved in a relegation struggle this season.
LEEDS UNITED
Changes in the owner and manager at the Yorkshire club, big surprise that Monk leftb though every credit for him for actually lasting a season under Mad Massimo.
New gaffer arrives after leading a Cypriot side, he has signed quite a few foreign players who may find the physical contact of the Championship hard to handle, should go close if they keep Chris Wood fit however they will be losing their first home game of the season.
MIDDLESBROUGH
Great appointment of Gary Monk, signing Britt Assombalonga good bit of business should be promoted at the end of the season, suspect they will be one of those clubs that will be too good for the Championship but not quite good enough for the Premiership.
MILLWALL
This will be a tiough season for the lads from the New Den, and the key to them staying up will be their form at the New Den, never an easy place form visiting teams to go, even ISIS can't beat Millwall.
Good signing in Conor Mc from Fleetwood, however young Mr Harris will have his work cut out to keep them up.
NORWICH CITY
The Canaries have gone down the Huddersfield route of appointing a manager from the Bundesliga, given they stuffed us 3-1 near the end of the season and looking a really good side the new man has a good base to build from. Will go very close to going up if they maintain their end of season form.
NOTTINGHAM FOREST
One of these days will get a Saturday afternoon trip to the City Ground, we are due one next season however it is on 4th Round FA Cup dy so one of us will have got through so a night jaunt to the Midlands on the cards again.
Been taken over by a Greek bloke who apparently was found guilty of match fixing in Greece, obviously he was unlucky to get caught apparently.
Having sold big Britt have splashed out two million on 34 yeaqr old Darryl Murphy to fill the gap, suspect a boardroom crisis is never that far away from the Trent side club. Like Warburton as a manager, cannot see them doing anything though next season.
PRESTON NORTH END
Champions no two ways about it, an interesting season awaits us North Enders under Mr Neil, still short iof some defensive cover, once sorted can see us walking this division, promotion party booked for our victory at Sunderland in March honest
QUEENS PARK RANGERS
Only hope for our trip to Loftus Road is there is more space for the knees in the seats in the top stand. Happy Ian still manager cannot see the Hoops doing anything next season, they won't go up and they won't go down, a season of nothingness looms for them.
READING
The Royals will spend all season passing the ball about to their hearts content under Mr Stam. Will possibkly find it harder this season after being surprise package last season. They were good on their own patch and were patchy away from home, were bailed out on many occasions by Al Habsi however he's buggered off and they have signed Mannone fromSunderland which probably means they will have to score twice as many goals next season to compensate for his mistakes.
SHEFFIELD UNITED
The Blunts return to the Championship after six seasons in League 1 they have a decnt manager in Chris Wilder although he does not seem to do happy, always comes across as a miserable get but there again he is a Yorkshireman. They ahve resigned Ched which does seem to be a desperate move after all he only seems too score taps ins on the Welsh seaside. Last away match of the season, so it will be April before I can plonk my arse in the Jessica Ennis End.
SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY
A tough season this for Carlos and his boys having missed out in the play offs in the last two seasons suspect the owners will not expect anything less than promotion this season. They have bought the White Pele George Boyd but getting the best out of Jordan he scores when he wants Rhodes may be the key. Sadly for Wednesday I fear there will be three teams who wiull be better again. Questions is will Fernando turn up at Deepdale on the opening day of teh season he's on a red card hat trick against us.
SUNDERLAND
September 30 cannot come too soon, when the Black Cats come to Deepdale with ex North End manager Grayson. He will get a good reception form me as the guy did an excellent job in the four years he was at Deepdale. Suspect McGeady will be injured for that one as well. Larry signing players that he has already worked with as usual , Vaughan and McGeady he is after Lewis Grabban as well who was also linked with Noth End last season.
If the Sunderland fans expect exciting football they may be disappointed as Larry is a defensive boss. As for going up not this season.
WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS
Chinese owners inconjunction with a Portuguese super agent are on the verge of turning the once great English club into a feeded club for any budding player from the Iberian Peninsular. Surprised they don't actually play their home gamnes in Lisbon. Appointed a Portuguese manager, spent £15 million twice on players in the recent months can only see this ending in tears.
Best of luck to all this season
All those exotic venues from Grimsby to Swindon hopes and expectations will rise and be dashed once again has only a handful of clubs can actually win anything as for others they will exit through the trap doors and for the rest who knows.
There will be long nights on the road were the signpost 13.7 miles to the end of the roadworks between Sandbach and Keele is always a sign to dread after you've lost a night game at Cardiff.
Plenty of beer and food will be consumed, bucket loads of money will be spent, why? because we enjoy it.
Anyway here's my irrelevant guide to this years Championship it will include a bit of piss taking, for those easily offended, tough titty.
First up
ASTON VILLA
Interesting tweet from their chairman Dr Xia this summer saying he thought the Championship last year was a poor division, they sent neigh on 40 million being mid table cannon fooder in a poor division, says a lot about Villa last season.
They have spent a bit again this season mainly employing Wayne Bridge's best mate John Terry, have also signed Chris Samba, so if those two play any ball over the top will cause them utmost problems.
Glenn Whelan also signed, they have a lot of serious ability in their squad depends on whether Brucie can get them going. Interesting to see if Ross McCormack can get over his garden wall.
Anything short of promotion for this lot a disaster.
BARNSLEY
Second season for the Tykes at this level, also having sold Winnall and Houahane, may find this season a bit of a struggle, no major signings Isgrove from Southampton and one of the thousands of lads Chelsea send out on loan Ike Ugbo sem to be the only arrivals.
Cannot see anything but a relegation fight for these guys may have to rely on Michael Parkinson and Dickie Bird to keep them up.
BIRMINGHAM CITY
Wheeler Dealer Honest Arry will be working his magic with the players this close season at St Andrew's rumoured to be after thousands of players including Hugill from North End (put up or shut up Harry mate) also been lined with the likes of Robbie Keane, Ashley Cole and Keith Downing, suspect Arry won't be happy until he signs Sandro or Nico thingy from Rangers after all he always does sign these players.
Absolutely zilch chance of going up but that won't tax Arry, nothing taxes Arry.
BOLTON WANDERERS
A season of struggle awaits the newly promoted Wanderers, one thing is certain that a wind up order is usually only a day or two away for the club based these days in a retail park in Horwich.
Parkinson will make them hard to beat although most sides probably will do, staying up will be a bonus for the Trotters, being in existance and paying wages at the end of the season will be considered an achievement by the board.
BRENTFORD
Think this is their last season at Griffin Park, seem to be spending money as if it's going out of fashion, paid £1.8 million for Exeter's Ollie Watkins and seem to be lobbing money at foreign imports as well. All players bought by the Bees are signed due to performance statistics. Decent manager in Dean Smith they could end up anywhere in the league except in the top six.
BRISTOL CITY
Spending a fortune on unknown French players again, had a season of struggle last year only puklled their seasion around after a hammering at Deepdale, lost their best loanee in Tammy Abraham but mini Johnson has some decent contacts suspect they will end up with another super youngster from Chelsea. Usually win at Ashton Gate under Grayson but as he's left that could complicate matters. Play this lot on a Tuesday night at the Gate so looking forward to it.
BURTON ALBION
Staying up last season was an achievement for the smallest club in the Championship, if thgey do it again Clough can be considered to be a miracle worker.
They have signed Ross County's leading scorer Liam Boyce, also have taken Luke Murphy on loan from Leeds again, exceedingly well run club, second season syndrome may make it harder for them suspect they will go down if they don't then fair play to them.
CARDIFF CITY
Colin's side will be hard to beat next season, I like Warnock says what he thinks, never ponever plays what you could say was an attractive style of football quite attritional at times. Rock up there on 30/12/2017 for our traditional defeat, mid table for these lads this season.
DERBY COUNTY
Question is will the owner sack Rowett after failing to beat North End in a home match as has hhappened in the last two seasons, will soon find out as we play them at the Ipro on the second Tuesday of the season. They have signed Tom Huddlestone who will be useful at this level. Should do better with the players they have but somehow always seem to fade towards at the end of the season, will go close but not close enough.
FULHAM
Will be there or there abouts at the end of the season, probably disappointed they didn't go up last season as by far one of the best sides I saw. Play excellent football and have some talented footballers including a 16 year old full back Sessegnon. They beat North End three times last season which tells you how good they are.
Always a good trip to the Cottage irrespective of the result.
HULL CITY
A bold managerial appointment by the City board appointing a Russian as manager, however does beg the question what does he know about the Championship. Suspect there won't be many singing Slutky's amber and black army around the K Com this season. Not sure whether the owner or the fans are on friendly terms, may not be a season of happiness next to the Humber.
IPSWICH TOWN
Big Mick had a struggle last season and cannot se it getting any better this season, he has signed Garner from Rangers which will mean the number of head injuries in the East Anglian area will increase by 900% as Joey boy will fall to the turf at the merest whiff of contact. Joey boy will not score many at this level but he will annoy loads. Tough season for Big Mick don't think he will end the season at Portman Road. Town possibly involved in a relegation struggle this season.
LEEDS UNITED
Changes in the owner and manager at the Yorkshire club, big surprise that Monk leftb though every credit for him for actually lasting a season under Mad Massimo.
New gaffer arrives after leading a Cypriot side, he has signed quite a few foreign players who may find the physical contact of the Championship hard to handle, should go close if they keep Chris Wood fit however they will be losing their first home game of the season.
MIDDLESBROUGH
Great appointment of Gary Monk, signing Britt Assombalonga good bit of business should be promoted at the end of the season, suspect they will be one of those clubs that will be too good for the Championship but not quite good enough for the Premiership.
MILLWALL
This will be a tiough season for the lads from the New Den, and the key to them staying up will be their form at the New Den, never an easy place form visiting teams to go, even ISIS can't beat Millwall.
Good signing in Conor Mc from Fleetwood, however young Mr Harris will have his work cut out to keep them up.
NORWICH CITY
The Canaries have gone down the Huddersfield route of appointing a manager from the Bundesliga, given they stuffed us 3-1 near the end of the season and looking a really good side the new man has a good base to build from. Will go very close to going up if they maintain their end of season form.
NOTTINGHAM FOREST
One of these days will get a Saturday afternoon trip to the City Ground, we are due one next season however it is on 4th Round FA Cup dy so one of us will have got through so a night jaunt to the Midlands on the cards again.
Been taken over by a Greek bloke who apparently was found guilty of match fixing in Greece, obviously he was unlucky to get caught apparently.
Having sold big Britt have splashed out two million on 34 yeaqr old Darryl Murphy to fill the gap, suspect a boardroom crisis is never that far away from the Trent side club. Like Warburton as a manager, cannot see them doing anything though next season.
PRESTON NORTH END
Champions no two ways about it, an interesting season awaits us North Enders under Mr Neil, still short iof some defensive cover, once sorted can see us walking this division, promotion party booked for our victory at Sunderland in March honest
QUEENS PARK RANGERS
Only hope for our trip to Loftus Road is there is more space for the knees in the seats in the top stand. Happy Ian still manager cannot see the Hoops doing anything next season, they won't go up and they won't go down, a season of nothingness looms for them.
READING
The Royals will spend all season passing the ball about to their hearts content under Mr Stam. Will possibkly find it harder this season after being surprise package last season. They were good on their own patch and were patchy away from home, were bailed out on many occasions by Al Habsi however he's buggered off and they have signed Mannone fromSunderland which probably means they will have to score twice as many goals next season to compensate for his mistakes.
SHEFFIELD UNITED
The Blunts return to the Championship after six seasons in League 1 they have a decnt manager in Chris Wilder although he does not seem to do happy, always comes across as a miserable get but there again he is a Yorkshireman. They ahve resigned Ched which does seem to be a desperate move after all he only seems too score taps ins on the Welsh seaside. Last away match of the season, so it will be April before I can plonk my arse in the Jessica Ennis End.
SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY
A tough season this for Carlos and his boys having missed out in the play offs in the last two seasons suspect the owners will not expect anything less than promotion this season. They have bought the White Pele George Boyd but getting the best out of Jordan he scores when he wants Rhodes may be the key. Sadly for Wednesday I fear there will be three teams who wiull be better again. Questions is will Fernando turn up at Deepdale on the opening day of teh season he's on a red card hat trick against us.
SUNDERLAND
September 30 cannot come too soon, when the Black Cats come to Deepdale with ex North End manager Grayson. He will get a good reception form me as the guy did an excellent job in the four years he was at Deepdale. Suspect McGeady will be injured for that one as well. Larry signing players that he has already worked with as usual , Vaughan and McGeady he is after Lewis Grabban as well who was also linked with Noth End last season.
If the Sunderland fans expect exciting football they may be disappointed as Larry is a defensive boss. As for going up not this season.
WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS
Chinese owners inconjunction with a Portuguese super agent are on the verge of turning the once great English club into a feeded club for any budding player from the Iberian Peninsular. Surprised they don't actually play their home gamnes in Lisbon. Appointed a Portuguese manager, spent £15 million twice on players in the recent months can only see this ending in tears.
Best of luck to all this season
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