[Dingle-Dingle]

I think my neighbours are being sarcastic with me. I took my bins out earlier and they gave me a round of applause.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Just been turned down from that NHS volunteer scheme - they’ve got enough gynaecologists apparently.
Just waiting to hear back from the breast clinic. Fingers crossed.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Social isolation.....

Day 5 of home schooling. Testing if chloroform has a smell.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Just rang the hospital to see how my mate Dave`s getting on after using one of those new Dyson ventilators.
They say he`s picking up nicely.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Just to clarify...... this "One form of outdoors exercise per day" isn`t compulsory is it??

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Boris Johnson........

The man who finally ended the DFS sale.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Postman Pat says......

Keep your flaps and knockers clean.

Also don`t forget, a dirty knob is a friend to no one.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Can`t wait to sit round a fire, eating squirrel on a stick with the other survivors.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Ordered a Chinese last night.
Driver pulls up to the house and starts too walk to the door'
So I go out too meet him.
He started shouting " Isolate " Isolate "
I said "Mate, calm down. You're not that late. Only ordered it half hour ago."

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Last time I went into a bank wearing a mask and gloves I got arrested.

Now it`s legal.......

DD