[theo_luddite]

Where & When

Old McGalphsmiths Farm
Between the trees and the old gasometer
On the grass
In amongst the big blue and white buildings
Not far from Leeds Road
HD1 (who need the full post code anyway?)
Kick-off 15:00 UK Time
Saturday 30/01/2021

On the tellybox
We're on Sky Sports Football over here, including Now TV in addition to iFollow, all under the glare of them there big bright expensive Prima Donna League Standard Floodlights.

In them there furrin' parts, we're on a few local channels too.

Look up the channel in your country here
Might be on in a few other countries too not listed.
Check your channel listings folks, treats like this don't come round too often.

Latest news
Jaden Brown reportedly interesting St. Mirren in a loan deal. At the moment Careless says no.
Well, they've got until Sunday (maybe Monday) to leave us with only one left back. Haven't we been here before?.

Out Injured/Suspended
Danny Ward is still doing an impersonation of Darren Anderton - ask yer dad if you don't know him - and there's every chance that Pritchard will have laddered his stockings again in training this week.
Just looked - he has. No change there then.
REG, Schindler and Stears still slowly on the way back. Mbenza - hmmm, next. Koroma? Your guess is as good as mine.

Ward will be on the pitch however, Gavin Ward, running around with the whistle.


Back in the frame
Still too early for Tommy Elphick yet? 'Appen it is, but he's put his zimmer on wheels and walking stick down and is walking and running under his own steam. He's now got to recall how to do it with a ball so maybe not just yet? Hoggy also back training but not fit enough for this weekend.
Mini-Scanz has a couple of days of of murderball (give or take) under his belt (maybe), probably aches like a bastard if you believe anything Rooney says, but he's still young enough to take it.

Last time out
Bacuna finally got his eye back in on Tuesday - could do with a shed-load more from him for the rest of the season whether Koroma comes back firing on all cylinders or not - but despite having all the ball, all the corners and nearly all the shots we still came 2nd.



Smoke on t'other hand lost 1:2 at home to Watford. What a remarkable coincidence.  



All the other results from mid-week


Last-time at theirs
Think we both played 5-a-side with no defenders and the goalies had their hands tied tbh.
We came 2nd in a 7 goal, er, thriller? The annoying thing was, we scored 4 of them - just ask Stears.


Last Time at Ours
After winning the away game in October, 1-0, Town came out yapping like Terriers, well at the start of the 2nd half, and finished up roaring like sheep. What a start to the New Year that was!!
Things could surely only have got better. Oh yes they did - big time !!        
Baaaaaah, humbug!


Tables
Inspite of "null-points" so far this year, Town are still 14th and seemingly unable to get passed the 12th place barrier consistently.
Inspite of only 2 points this year, Stoke are still 9th and seemingly unable to get into the top 6 consistently.
Having reached our level, we're both consistently inconsistent.


Form
We both need locking up for this years form - yes I've said it before.


Town last 4 at home, Stoke last 4 away


Stoke are actually unbeaten in their last 8 away games - quite a record - they've drawn all of the last 6 away, which explains why they have stalled a bit.

So the prediction for Saturday is ........... ?? As you know, I don't do predictions me.

We need a striker, or anyone with a radar that can find the onion bag

Kwik Kwiz

So who out of the current bunch of Stokies would you run like mad and grab given the opportunity?

Paul Ince?
Benik Afobe?
Smiffy?
Your choice?

Yes Smiffy's a full back but he scored more for us than some of our current squad.
Well we seem to be on a trend of bringing t'old 'uns back again, so ????

Innies and Outies
Now then, about that fella Afobe - the lad that gets off a train at random stations up and down the West Coast main lines and asks the gaffa for a game.
Would you have him back as a striker? Currently on loan to somewhere I can't spell in Turkey - hell, he fell asleep for a long time on that train.


He's probably forgotten how to get to Huddersfield Station to be honest.
Does he have Kevin Phillips's phone number? Can you pass it to him?

Who's banging 'em in
Benik only had one game this season so no wonder he's not in this list


Local music
I checked and I think it's about 2 years since I did the away thread - so apologies if I repeat some but I can't be arsed to look.

So let's piss 'em off to start with Stokes favourite son and Port Vale fan
Robbie

Well, you never know, it might happen Saturday.

That Boy Band / Girl Band shit of the 90's passed me by (thank fook) while I was in Canada.
Q107 FM - look it up. Listen online to Derringer in the Morning.
Always good for a laugh (11:00 - 15:00 over here so you miss Jezza Whine on Radio 2 )
Tool the Day  Smoke-on-Stench fans will probably say it's me after reading this thread

Luvvable Lemmy (RIP)
I more than likely picked Ace of Spades last time so  ... here's another quiet 'un


Slash - get a beer (or a bottle of Prosecco AmChaff) as this goes on a bit and some of it will bore your bum off. It's not an "offishal" one.


Then there's Phil Taylor and The Crafty Cockney (moved to Stoke from 'that-there-Larndan' and I believe mentored the young Phil before eventually checking out far too young on 20 double tops) who could play sweet music with three 'arrers'.
Bruno Brookes who could play the odd decent bit of vinyl on the old Radio 1 turntables and Anthea Turner who could play music with me all night long, if only she knew where I live and we weren't all supposed to be in isolation.  



Life's a beach sometimes.

They can't all lose
But we'll make it a full hand this month if we do.


We've played 'em before
5 for and 9 against in the last 2 matches, are you sure we play football?


Next up?
Luton away next Saturday


Also changes to kick-off times for two fixtures in a month or so - I'm sure Snoots will be all over this like the skin on a bowl of cold rice pudding.
- Derby County (A) will now start at 7pm 23/02/21
- Birmingham City (H) also to begin at 7pm 02/03/21

Pressers
Same squad as Brizzle according to Careless - depending on how Mini-Scanz trains this afternoon.
https://www.htafc.com/news/2021/january/...encounter/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2tEG7fdBMZ0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=75Sx2HPnjAU


The views from Smoke-on-Stench
https://www.stokecityfc.com/news/2021/ja...onference/

Stoke player doing Careless's team Talk - pin it up on the dressing room door lads


Kwik Kwiz

Yorkshires of a Sunday?
Are you .....
An onion gravy for starters type?
Strictly only with the Sunday Roast and gravy and trimmings type?
A Golden Syrup/Maple Syrup or some other sweet topping/filling for dessert type?
Or an all 3 greedy bastard like me type?  

Big assed Yorkshires every other day o't' week. Take your pick.
Toad in t'ole?
Yorkshire filled with chili?
Yorkshire filled with curry? (any type)
Yorkshire filled wi'a Barnsley chop (or 2) might also be considered the alternative to the Sunday Roast job?
Veggie Yorkshire? - (I don't know why, but some would, or do, wet or dry).
Yorkshire filled with stew?
Yorkshire wrap? (pick yer filling).
Yorkshire reggae? (wi' lime marmalade, orange or lemon marmalade and strawberry jam in'. Wi jammin, wi jammin, wi jammin in the name o' de Lord.).
Yorkshire Dale (wi' owt else fancy ya care to suggest? Fish, scampi, chips, rice, hell, the Chinese take-aways normally have everything covered but Yorkshires   ).

If we weren't all shut down I'd open the worlds first (or maybe Wolverhampton's first) Yorkshire Pudding Emporium - it has to be the next "not so quite" fast food surely? All those currently waiting for hours in a traffic jam and blocking the roads into/out of town for a Micky D could have mine in 15 minutes (probably longer tbh).

For the Smokies reading - what do you like with your Oatcakes?
I've seen mushrooms suggested, eggs and bacon, Full-Monty breakfasts and even strawberries and butter, or is it strictly just a glass of milk?

Just remember folks ....

[jjamez]

Full roast with yorkies ont plate for me, we used to have yorkies then the roast, but why not enjoy them all together?

Also don't mind a toad in the hole, either home made or ready made, tbf I ain't against ready made yorkies if needs be, had them with stew a few times in place of dumplins

[Lord Snooty]

I'm noan reight bothered abart Yorkshire pudding me sen, theo. I can tek or leave em. Whenever we go art for Sunday dinner, I don't think I've ever ad a proper edible one. I don't think these so called chefs know ar to mek em reight.

[theo_luddite]

Mek 'em thi Sen Snoots, or buy them ready made 'uns from t'Supermarket and waarrm 'em gently.

[Lord Snooty]

Aye, lad. We get ar Aunt Bessie to mek em fer us.

[ritchiebaby]

Aldi's Yorkies (cheapo cheapo but still good) with any roast, filled with piping hot gravy so I can dip my tatties in - that's T A T T I E S by the way.

[theo_luddite]

As long as they can't arrest you for it ritchie

[theo_luddite]

Same 11 for Town

---

Mini-Scanz is on the bench

[Lord Snooty]

Good start and a good, well worked opening goal. And then, typically, we gift them an equaliser. A terrible pass by Keogh, followed by a stupid tackle by Sarr.
Interesting end to the half with the red card. Interesting to see how we cock this one up now against ten men.

[theo_luddite]

Red card all day long that one. Once again we score first and let the oppo back in with some sloppy play at the back.