[Dingle-Dingle]

Little Johnny goes to see his Grandad, to ask him about his experiences of the war for a school history project.
After talking for ten minutes Grandad can see that Johnny is bored so to liven things up says

"If you promise not to tell your Grandmother and keep quiet I'll show you a bullet!"

"Wow" says Johnny, "You've got a real bullet?"

So Grandad show's little Johnny the bullet, after carefully inspecting it he turns to the old man and says

"do you have any other memorabilia?"

Grandad smiles and tells him "I've got a revolver."

"A REVOL..."

"SSHhhhh! Johnny, don't let your Grandmother hear." whispers Grandad.

"Sorry Grandad" replies the boy "I was excited. Where do you keep the revolver?"

"In my old artillery box with the grenades." smiles Grandad.

"GRE--" squeals the boy.

"Sshhhush lad," The old man warns, "your grandmother won't be happy about me showing you weapons."

"Can I see the grenades?"

"Yes" answers the old chap, pleased to have his grandson so interested, but still wary of his wife. "I suppose you'll want to see the the rifle too."

"A RIFLE!" Breathes the boy, "oh Grandad where is the rifle?"

"With the machine gun." Confesses the old man.

"A MAC... machine gun Grandad?" the boy states incredulously. "Where's the machine gun?"

The old man looks up and replies "In the loft behind the tank..."

"A xxxx TANK!"

DD