[Ska'dForLife-WBA]

2025 is upon us, and so Albion don the sacred striped armour, consult the Lady in the Cut, pull the sword from the stone (or the ball from the boulder?) and embark once again on our romantic and ever-doomed quest to regain the grail that's eluded us for nearly fifty-seven years. But we'll be doing so without the guiding hand of any wise wizard: Raphael Wicky looks somewhat unlikely to become our Merlin from Berlin (not least because he's actually Swiss), likewise Johnny Heitinga our Percival from the Mersey-val, and though Dutchman Rene Hake now stands as favourite - which is frankly less Camelot, more dam-a-lot - any appointment at this stage wouldn't come in time to have the new management team in place for Saturday's tie. So all in all, we're fortunate to have someone with the ex-calibre of Chris Brunt to lead us into this opening battle.

Which is liable, alas, to end in tears regardless. Opponents Bournemouth continue to enjoy their Premier League existence, presently placed in 7th with no reason whatsoever not to have a crack at the cup this season; we're winless on their turf in all competitions since August 2011, and of our last sixteen cup ties against Premier League sides, we've won only three (with just one - versus West Ham in 2020 - achieved as an upset from the Championship). We've also met the Cherries in the FA Cup only twice in history, on both occasions at Dean Court: to a soundtrack of Steps and Fatboy Slim, a certain Eddie Howe knocked us out the last time on 2nd January 1999, so you have to travel all the way back to 8th January 1955 for our sole victory against the team then known as Bournemouth & Boscombe Athletic, undoubtedly helped along by the strains of Dickie Valentine and his Finger of Suspicion (shortly before Dickie was advised that if he wanted to remain the team physio and avoid a prison sentence, he should stick to his Magic Sponge instead).

With no replays anymore, if we could go the distance and take it to extra-time or even penalties then it'd be a decent showing. An unlikely hope in itself, but then, unlikely hopes are what our grail quest's always made of.