26-01-2023, 17:56
Wakey's on his way to having his own fan club, including me, after that rant.
Short-sleeved football shirts worn over long-sleeved tee shirts, or are they liberty bodices, if you're young, google them.
Short-sleeved football shirts and bare, unimpressive arms, or more hard tattoos than The Illustrated Man, topped off with GLOVES ...... FFS!
GLOVES! When I played they were a sign you were NESH, so everybody kicked you. Let's get back to it!
Bandaged hands, you never see a game without them. Do they mean more rings than Edith Sitwell, or so much w**king boxing gloves are necessary in bed?
Drummers with all the rhythm of a disturbed six-year-old locked in a side ward.
Referees who think camply showing a card of any colour to someone on the touchline enhances their manhood.
Commentators who use the word "persuasion" as in "those of an Arsenal persuasion". This is your fault Jane Austen.
Rainbow laces and no gay players.
The universal learned banging of the turf by attention-seeking players exaggerating the most minor of injuries.
Applauding the fans when being subbed after 60 minutes of total anonymity.
Managers who insist on looking like refugees from a charity shop and refuse to smile even when their team scores six.
Goalkeepers who think a corner is a prompt to behaving as if Agadou is playing full blast and waving their stupid gloves in the air will help the defence.
Any fan over the age of eight who cries when his/her team loses, and any player past puberty who does the same ......
Kissing the shirt or the badge - save it for the bedroom.
Applauding anyone for dying. Imagine, the biggest round of your life came after you'd left it, what bigger testament to a life wasted?
Centre backs going down hurt. Nothing short of a train crash should hurt a proper centre back.
Goalies who concede a goal and immediately need a drink of water. Water helps in the Atacama Desert, not between the sticks. Trust me!
That's enough for now. Chants, if they are funny, original or engaging add to the game. Otherwise they demonstrate why your missus is about to leave you.
Short-sleeved football shirts worn over long-sleeved tee shirts, or are they liberty bodices, if you're young, google them.
Short-sleeved football shirts and bare, unimpressive arms, or more hard tattoos than The Illustrated Man, topped off with GLOVES ...... FFS!
GLOVES! When I played they were a sign you were NESH, so everybody kicked you. Let's get back to it!
Bandaged hands, you never see a game without them. Do they mean more rings than Edith Sitwell, or so much w**king boxing gloves are necessary in bed?
Drummers with all the rhythm of a disturbed six-year-old locked in a side ward.
Referees who think camply showing a card of any colour to someone on the touchline enhances their manhood.
Commentators who use the word "persuasion" as in "those of an Arsenal persuasion". This is your fault Jane Austen.
Rainbow laces and no gay players.
The universal learned banging of the turf by attention-seeking players exaggerating the most minor of injuries.
Applauding the fans when being subbed after 60 minutes of total anonymity.
Managers who insist on looking like refugees from a charity shop and refuse to smile even when their team scores six.
Goalkeepers who think a corner is a prompt to behaving as if Agadou is playing full blast and waving their stupid gloves in the air will help the defence.
Any fan over the age of eight who cries when his/her team loses, and any player past puberty who does the same ......
Kissing the shirt or the badge - save it for the bedroom.
Applauding anyone for dying. Imagine, the biggest round of your life came after you'd left it, what bigger testament to a life wasted?
Centre backs going down hurt. Nothing short of a train crash should hurt a proper centre back.
Goalies who concede a goal and immediately need a drink of water. Water helps in the Atacama Desert, not between the sticks. Trust me!
That's enough for now. Chants, if they are funny, original or engaging add to the game. Otherwise they demonstrate why your missus is about to leave you.