[Ska'dForLife-WBA]

If push comes to shove, most of us would probably wish ourselves a dozen years younger. Whether it's the chance to right past wrongs, to wander a little way down the path not taken, or just the opportunity to not hear the bathroom scales creak so much in the morning, a twelve-year jaunt through the space-time continuum would be a fascinating voyage. With that in mind, I can only applaud Albion's current initiative to transport us all back to 2007 and relive in full technicolour the last time we participated in a Football League playoff: a rickety assortment of shiftless mercenaries and indifferent journeymen with one eye on the exit, facing a local rival over two legs with a trip to Wembley at stake. Plus this time we get to do it without that "umbrella-ella-ella" song annoying the nuts off us every five minutes, which is the biggest mercy we're likely to get in the coming week.

Alas, the similarities to 2007 end at the dugout, as our last playoff outing was overseen by an actual manager with actual tactics, which is a privilege that the Albion board have deemed surplus to requirements on this auspicious occasion. A lot therefore hinges on our Macchiavellian masterplan of lulling the opposition into a false sense of security by pretending to be a set of clueless, talent-starved dunderheads; the first stage of which was executed with admirable aplomb at Derby last Sunday, where the players succeeded in delivering the most accomplished display of muppetry it's been my pleasure to see since Michael Caine was visited by three suspiciously rubbery ghosts on Christmas night.

But will it be enough? Well, while Mark Jenkins has been putting into action the manoeuvre that will hereafter be referred to as Operation F**kwit, Aston Villa have been steadily going about the novel business of winning football matches: ten in twelve, to be precise, with a blip only at season's end against two top sides. Whether that blip means that the bubble's finally burst, I suspect we'll have to wait and find out. We have two of the division's best scorers at our disposal, and we've taken four points off Villa so far this season, but they'll be out for revenge this time round, and you can guarantee that mistakes will be punished.

Here's hoping we've got enough. But if we do, then it'll be in spite of the decisions made by the club this year, not because of them; and that's a problem that will have to be faced up to sooner rather than later.