[Maddix]

Christ Maddix, are you a millionaire?

Or should I say were a millionaire?

No    the flucking wife just thinks I am   I've been on three shopping trips with her and spent £800 plus, £500 plus and now another £700   and there's no telling how much she's spent when I'm not looking   Flucking Asda lager and Amber leaf roll-ups is all I have to look forward to for the next 6 months    There's no wonder I hate flucking Christmas   and maybe she'll have bought me a Toblerone  

And then she'll really flucking rub it in and insist on visiting her flucking mother