[theo_luddite]

V

Saturday 2nd December
Kick-off - 15:00
North End of Stanley Park
Just ask for Gwladys - she'll meet you on the corner as the lights are coming on.
L4 4EL


We're on the telly

No not not here, but just about everywhere else.
http://www.livesoccertv.com/match/250286...ield-town/

Find your favourite country (and maybe which channel to try and find a dodgy feed from) above.

Theo's Thinking's

I've had the day off today to get over the shock of last night's result so I can write this crap. That and I didn't get home until after 2:30 this morning.

So this is the 3rd of a run of 6 games where play exactly the same 6 clubs as we do at the end of the season, albeit in a slightly different order. Have perceptions changed at all regarding our ability to take some points from these games compared to when we first saw the fixture list?

Everton certainly haven't been firing them in like last season. OK, any side would miss a goal scorer like Lukaku - ask Moaninho, he can't get him scoring either - but after spending ~ £140 million, it took a hat-trick from Wayne Boozy plus another goal on Wednesday night to take Everton above us on goal difference.

Glad to see the back of November if I'm honest. A month that looked like we could get a few points from on paper turned into one of 3 points from one win, 2 goals for and 11 against. The highlights being the win v The Baggies and being 6 minutes from taking a point from The Mancs. The lows being the spankings at Bournemouth and Arsenal, though in both cases we didn't lie down and have our tummies tickled, even if the scorelines suggest otherwise.

Manager-go-round

"Don't panic, don't panic, we're playing Huddersfield soon. Sack the manager and get a new one in, we'll have a chance of beating them by then."

In true style, after giving the Dyke Hopper the push, they've eventually appointed Big Sam just before they play us. (Or have they? Still to be announced as I type). Now, how much he can influence them in just two days of training is open to opinion. He can only just start to begin to make them harder to beat really. It will take a while for his dire form of football and a guaranteed top half finish to kick in. Look, don't let 4-0 v West Ham fool you, he wasn't in charge then either. The 'Ammers have been pants all season, yeh we know they beat us and we've been pants away from home all season since we beat Palace, but Pardew has a far harder job on his hands down there there than Big (I'll do a conference talk in the Far East for you for a £million) Sam has at Goodison.

New Stadium

(Yawn) - Yet another club that has talked about it for years and actually done sod all about it in reality. Well, maybe, just maybe, they might get it done now and about time too. Charging £30+ for views in a stand whether for home or away supporters is scandalous. Look chaps, cantilever stands were being draughted in the 1950's and built in the 1960's in grounds in this country. 60 years later, fans are still expected, by some clubs, to watch games in shallow, sub-pitch or at best pitch level, uncovered paddocks and low roofed, pillar obstructed stands.

Yes that is the view some fans will have on Saturday and quite honestly, it isn't good enough. You can take all the crap about the atmosphere and history of these old grounds and stick it where the sun doesn't shine for me. You can also say I don't have to go if I don't want to - what? So someone else can have the privilege of the same view? It's not about me, but the deal handed to football fans in general of some of these dinosaur clubs. £26 on Wednesday for an unobstructed view in London, £30 on Saturday for who knows what of a view, other than it will be obstructed somewhere, in Scousleand. Which was the better deal, regardless of the outcome?
Look, if you paid good money for you and your other half and the kids to go watch a film and you could at best see the bottom half of the screen and there was a bloody great pillar in the way of part of the screen too, would you be happy?

Extra, Extra, read all about it.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everton_F....new_stadia

That having been said - West Ham? What were they thinking?

OK, rant over - got it in before the game so you don't accuse me of bitching about it afterwards..

Goodison Park


Footballgroundguide.com

Now according to Wiki, and a famous Liverpool historian, who's bank account is a stash under his mattress and he pays his taxes if he feels like it and if you still haven't worked it out, he owns the only remaining working Treacle and Jam Butty mines in the world, both highly reliable sources of information, Everton originally played in the southeast corner of Stanley Park.
The first official match took place in 1879. In 1882, a man named J. Cruitt donated land at Priory Road which became the club's home. In 1884 Everton became tenants at Anfield, which was owned by John Orrell, a land owner who was a friend of Everton F.C. member John Houlding. Orrell lent Anfield to the club in exchange for a small rent. Houlding purchased the land from Orrell in 1885 and effectively became Everton's landlord by charging the club rent, which increased from £100 to £240 a year by 1888 – and was still rising until Everton left the ground in 1892. Supposedly the club regarded the increase in rent as unacceptable.

In truth, the Treacle Mine it was built on was a very thin seam and they weren't in the business of mining jam butties, even though a thicker seam was sticking through the treacle seam. A further dispute between Houlding and the club's committee led to Houlding attempting to gain full control of the club by registering the company, "Everton F.C. and Athletic Grounds Ltd". Everton left Anfield for a new ground, Goodison Park, where the club have played ever since as the new Treacle Mine was over a far richer vein of treacle. Houlding attempted to take over Everton's name, colours, fixtures and league position, but was denied by The Football Association. Instead, Houlding formed a new club, Liverpool F.C. who eventually moved into Anfield as the country's first recorded squatters. They succesfully mined the Jam Butty Seam to fund the club and eventually buy the ground.

Goodison Park, the first major football stadium to be built in England, was opened in 1892. Goodison Park has staged more top-flight football games than any other ground in the United Kingdom and was the only English club ground to host a semi-final at the 1966 FIFA World Cup. It was also the first English ground to have under soil heating and the first to have two tiers on all sides. I've already mentioned the views. The church grounds of St Luke the Evangelist are adjacent to the corner of the Main Stand and the Howard Kendall Gwladys Street End.

On match days, in a tradition going back to 1962, players walk out to the theme song for Z-Cars, which is named "Johnny Todd".  

It is a traditional Liverpool children's song collected in 1890 by Frank Kidson and tells the story of a sailor betrayed by his lover while away at sea.

Imagine that, a Scouser cheating on their other half? Wouldn't happen these days or it would be all over the papers now wouldn't it? Oh! Hang on a minute.

The History of Toffee - or life above the Everton Treacle Mines

Now also according to those good chaps at Wiki, and my historian friend, Everton were founded by the ecclesiastical owners of the Everton Treacle Mines, as St Domingo FC in 1878 so that members of the congregation of St Domingo Methodist New Connexion Chapel in Breckfield Road North, Everton could play sport year round – cricket was played in summer. The club's first game was a 1–0 victory over Everton Church Club. The club was renamed Everton in November 1879 after the local area, as people outside the congregation wished to participate.

In 1925 the club signed Dixie Dean from Tranmere Rovers. In 1927–28, Dean set the record for top-flight league goals in a single season with 60 goals in 39 league games, which is a record that still stands. He helped Everton win their third League Championship that season. However, Everton were relegated to the Second Division two years later during internal turmoil at the club. (What, like now you mean?). Thus ending their first succesful era.

Dixie Dean at a fancy dress do in Nottingham dressed as an Everton Mint.

Their second one came in the 1960's when Harry Catterick was made manager in 1961. In 1962–63, his second season in charge, Everton won the League Championship. In 1966 the club won the FA Cup with a 3–2 win over Sheffield Wednesday. Everton again reached the final in 1968, but this time were unable to overcome West Bromwich Albion at Wembley. Two seasons later in 1969–70, Everton won the League Championship, finishing nine points clear of nearest rivals L666s United. During this period, Everton were the first English club to achieve five consecutive years in European competitions – covering the seasons from 1961–62 to 1966–67.

Their most successful period of history came in the 1980's when Howard Kendall was manager.

Domestically, Everton won the FA Cup in 1984 and two League Championships in 1984–85 and 1986–87. In Europe, the club won its first, and so far only, European trophy by securing the European Cup Winners' Cup in 1985. The European success came after first beating University College Dublin, Inter Bratislava and Fortuna Sittard. Then, Everton defeated German giants Bayern Munich 3–1 in the semi-finals, despite trailing at half time (in a match voted the greatest in Goodison Park history), and recorded the same scoreline over Austrian club Rapid Vienna in the final. Having won both the League and Cup Winners' Cup in 1985, Everton came very close to winning a treble, but lost to Manchester United in the FA Cup final. The following season, 1985–86, Everton were runners-up to neighbours Liverpool in both the League and the FA Cup, but did recapture the League Championship in 1986–87.

1985 European Cup Winners' Cup Final starting line-up. Many were considering buying new boots and asking for a game this weekend before they saw the West Ham result.

Around this time, the Jam Butty miners became involved in a European Final in Heysel - the net outcome of which was a blanket ban on English Clubs competing in Europe. So Everton's potentially all conquering side were robbed of the right to compete on Europe's top stages and the side was broken up. Juglugs was so devastated he joined Barcelona.

This has left a bitter taste in the mouths of many old Evertonians, one that a whole jar of Everton Mints can't sweeten and not helped by the Jam Butty Miners of Anfield Road going on to be as successful as they were in the 1990's whwn English clubs were allowed to return.

Since being founders of the Football League, they have only spent 4 seaasons outside the top division, under whatever name you want to describe it. Once the treacle and jam butty mines dried up, The Scousers became funded by Littlewoods and The Toffees by Vernons. Both Football Pools companies succesfully mined the pockets and wallets of the Great British Public until The National Lottery almost stopped them in their tracks. You can still do The Pools online. All the former major players have joined forces to provide a single attempt to offer better prizes than those thieving sods that run the National and Euro Lucky Dips.

First home Kit

For some reason it has a somewhat familiar look to it that I can't quite put my finger on.


They later went on to use black and white colours (if not stripes) before realising they looked a bit like a bunch of mints in a sweetie jar and reverted to the plain blue shirt in the early 1900's. They have also looked a bit like Blackburn Rovers and Manchester City on occassions, but might not thank me for mentioning it.

Club Crest.



The Crest is based on the former pit building at the top of the first Everton Treacle Mine shaft. They later put a roof on to stop the kids falling in, or maybe getting out.



When the Treacle seam in this mine dried up they then used it lock-up scallywags who had been caught nicking and reselling the wheels off the Treacle Mine carts and leaving the carts on piles of bricks and selling the wheels to the Jam Butty Mine owners for spares, a Scouse tradition that carries on to this day.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Everton_Lock-Up

Everton Mints

Unlike our hard boiled Yorkshire Mixtures, tough all the way through, Everton Mints have a tough outer shell and a soft centre. A bit like today's Everton side really some might say?

According to Harry Bassett, who now makes and sells said sugary treats - The Everton Mint is a traditional British mint best known for its distinctive black and white colouring. The mints were first produced in a Liverpool sweet shop close to Goodison Park, home of football club Everton FC – hence the name. It happened by accident when Hitler dropped one on the Treacle Mine on the way home. The heat from the blast caused the outside of the Treacle to set in a hard stripy shell, thus giving the owner of the sweet shop, one Mother Noblett, the idea to creat the mints to appeal to Everton fans, making them black and white in honour of the team’s then black and white kit.

She even persuaded the club to let a girl walk around the ground before matches, throwing mints into the crowd! Needless to say the mints caught on and remain hugely popular – even if Everton have since changed their kit colour to blue!

Safety Notice.
If you don't pay attention you might still get hit in the eye with one before the game.


Scouse

So what the hell is Scouse? Well apart from someone with a strong nasal accent that is part Irish, part North Welsh, Part Lancastrianese and part who the hell knows what that arrived on the docks, it's a kind of stew. An Irish Stew? Go wash your mouth out sonny.


Again according to those good chaps at Wiki, Scouse is a type of lamb or beef stew. The word comes from "Lobscouse", a stew commonly eaten by sailors throughout Northern Europe, which became popular in seaports such as Liverpool.

The first known use of the term "lobscouse" is dated 1706, according to Webster's dictionary. Smollet refers to "lob's course" in 1750. The roots of the word are unknown,but there are at least three competing theories. It has been suggested that the dish is "almost certainly" of Baltic origin, and labs kauss in Latvian and labas kaušas in Lithuanian both mean "good ladleful". Similar dishes are traditional in countries around the North Sea, such as Norway (lapskaus), Sweden (lapskojs), Denmark (skipperlabskovs meaning "skipper's lobscouse) and northern Germany (Labskaus). Another theory suggests a Low German origin from lappen (dewlap) and kaus (bowl). An English origin has also been proposed: through "lout’s course", via "lob’s course" to "lobscouse".

Recipe and variants

19th century sailors made lobscouse by boiling salted meat, onions and pepper, with ship's biscuit used to thicken the dish. Some variants can also be based on fish. Modern English scouse resembles the Norwegian stew lapskaus, although it differs from the German labskaus which is similar to Hash. Scouse is a stew, similar to Lancashire hotpot, usually of mutton, lamb (often neck) or beef with vegetables, typically potatoes, carrots and onions. It is commonly served with pickled beetroot or cabbage and bread.

Scouse is strongly associated with Liverpool, where it remains popular and is a staple of local pub and café menus, although recipes vary greatly and often include ingredients which are inconsistent with the thrifty roots of the dish. "Scouse" has become part of a genre of slang terms which refer to people by stereotypes of their dietary habits, e.g. Limey, Rosbif (for the English), Frogs (for the French) and Kraut (for Germans).

Famous Scousers

Go back and read the Reds Jam Butty Mine thread from about a month ago. I've already done it once. Oh, and I don't think John Bishop is an Everton fan, but I might be wrong.

Where to keep your alloys safe, where to drink, where's the good scram, how to get there, anything else I missed that matters to you?
            Good these , about time too.

Have a look in here. Don't forget to come back, I haven't done yet.
Football Ground Guide

Stats
(bits from the Beeb and Transfermarkt)

Table

Wednesday meant the Blue end of Scousleand caught us up, and with a 9 goal swing it put them above us on goal difference. Town have now dropped to 14th place.


Last Line-ups



Looks like Dixie Dean might have retired

Just out of interest, those cheapskates at Arsenal put out this side against Town on Wednesday, which was worth more than who we'll seee on Saturday put together.



Huddersfield Nil are likely to revert to the line-up that started against The Mancs, though VLP will have to find someone else's throat to use to keep his hands warm on Saturday for the second game of his 3 match ban.

Innie's and Outies

Lukaku was the biggest outie at about £76 million. A total of around £97 million was brought in from sales, while around £142 million was spent. So net spend about the same as us, net position at the moment about the same as us too.





Scorers
Wayne Boozy is their top scorer with 8, though 3 were on Wednesday. Huddersfield Nil meanwhile are looking for our 4th goal away from home this season.



Head2Head
Otherwise known as the Liverpool kiss

This is another place we haven't been to since 1900 and frozen to death so quite honestly - does it matter?

They can't both win.

In the dogfight that is the bottom 14, the following play each other this weekend.

Saturday
Everton 15:00 Huddersfield Town
Leicester City 15:00 Burnley
Stoke City 15:00 Swansea City
West Bromwich Albion 15:00 Crystal Palace

Sunday
AFC Bournemouth  13:30 Southampton


Wagbo's Wise Words


So as my scouse banker, tax expert and historian friend might say, let's have a tattifilarious day out in Scouseland and maybe, just maybe, get to drop that Huddersfield Nil tag and get to spread a little bit of Happiness around. Tattie bye everyone, tattie bye.


My tax adviser and one of his Jam Butty miners

Ey, ey, ey! - I'll look after yer car fer about 5 quid mister if you want to try the local street parking. Don't quote me on that, blame me cousin's hubby for telling me that one. Look out for the permit area's too. The fines are more like the cost of a new set of alloys.

[Lord Snooty]

Nice one theo. Love all the treacle and jam butty history.  

As for Goodison. I've been to a lot of football grounds in my time and Goodison Park is without doubt one of the worst.  I'd say probably 2nd only to Bloomfield Road in crappiness.
The amount of money we had to spend to get our beautiful modern stadium up to Premier League standard and then Everton are allowed to play in this dump and fans have to watch from a stand that surely was condemned after the Valley Parade fire. How is it still fit for purpose?

Rant over.    

Have to win this one. We have an Everton fan at work. He's a good lad but one still needs to have bragging rights, doesn't one.  

[theo_luddite]

Big Sam appointment now confirmed

---

Cheers Snoots - I wouldn't want anyone to think Liverpool made it's fortune from thieving scallywags working on the docks. The truth about mining in the area has to be preserved even if it has largely been kept, erm, undergound so to Speke, er speak.

---

Oh, and one other thing about all this Snoots. Because they don't teach it at school, you tell the kids of today about this and they just won't believe you. ELT won't believe a word of what I've written up there. Kids huh? Oooooo'd 'ave 'em?

[WakeyTerrier]

Big Sam appointed....that's us gubbed then.

[Lord Snooty]

Apparently Sam has never beaten us as a manager.

[theo_luddite]

Updated original post with link to Wagbo's presser.

[jjamez]

Reckon we'll struggle again. Will either be a Swansea performance where nothing clicks or a Bournemouth performance where we seem ok but capitulate.

Think we might attack a few times but ultimately be hit on the break

[theo_luddite]

Woke up to find major disruption on the West Coast rattlers. Overhead line problems between Euston and Watford could make train journeys exceedingly hit and miss today. Guess who was planning to go by train today?? Who said electric trains are more efficient? That cheap 1st Class ticket I bought from Stafford might be as much use as a chocolate fireguard today.

[theo_luddite]

They seem to be sorting out the rattlers

Meanwhile, I've stopped off for breakfast somewhere that sounds familiar

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=theo%2...erState=im

If you're ever in Stafford

[Amelia Chaffinch]

I'm going to see Mrs Brown's Boys this afternoon.