Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023

Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - Printable Version

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RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - Devongone - 11-08-2023

Your one consolation is that it isn't just you. It is England, it is widespread across Europe, it is almost worldwide.

Lose and the black guy will get racial abuse. Win and the opposition will abuse him instead. If it happens to Bukayo Saka, who is a wonderful player and seems like genuinely one of the nicest young guys around, then a young lad at Huddersfield isn't likely to escape.

Confiscate and sell all the offenders' property, ban them from every football ground in the country, make them ineligible for all benefits and make them work for the next ten years for the minimum wage. If the job pays more then the surplus goes to the state. It won't cure anything, but a lot of us will feel better. (if only we had an education system, we could re-educate them!)

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - theo_luddite - 11-08-2023

Quarter wits like 30p Lee, who tried to claim he wasn't even in the Government this week when he came out with his f'word fueled rant don't exactly help do they? It's not just football or sport in general, it's still rife across large parts of the population, as you say Devon.

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - theo_luddite - 11-08-2023

To add to that, we've an openly hostile and racist Government, backed by at least, 3 if not more, racist and hostile main stream press publications that are also funding two so called "balanced" news channels. We then wonder why some folk sitting in their mum's attic and probably drinking the contents of her drinks cabinet or stoking themselves up on Columbian marching powder behave the same way.

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - Baggiebob(BBB) - 11-08-2023

Great write up, and particulary listened to Chris Rea. You know I tried to copy him once and after a couple of seconds two srings broke and I gave up.

Well Hud'd and wba both need a win, will it be tomorrow?

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - Lord Snooty - 13-08-2023

Chuba Akpom on his way out of the Ayresome Park gates. They've got bids from Ajax and Lens in the offering of around ten million squid.

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - theo_luddite - 14-08-2023

Have to suspect this has been on a burner for a litttle while unless he's been injured. He's only been named once on the bench in the first 3 games and he didn't play then either.

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - Lord Snooty - 15-08-2023

Middlesbrough FC complete the signings of defender Lukas Engel and striker Emmanuel Latte Lath ahead of Championship game with Huddersfield Town - with Chuba Akpom close to joining Ajax.

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - Lord Snooty - 15-08-2023

Hudlin scored again for the B team.

Just saying.

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - theo_luddite - 17-08-2023

PART 2

Smoggies v Town
19th August 2023
Kick-off 15:00 UK Time

Riverside Stadium
Ayresome Park Road
and a fair bit of a walk beyond
Near the smelly dead shellfish
That the dredgers for Rich! Sunk's new corrupt Freeport
Are all killing off.
Brexit benefits my ar Aunt Fanny
Middlesbrough TS3 6RS

[Image: auntfannyscabinouthouse1.jpg?w=500]

[Image: auntfannyscabinouthouse1.jpg?w=500]

[Image: AF1QipN3T96J458fXrUCQjBWlFdMmH84lAXO18LX...-w680-h510]

Less than two weeks after Town's B team lost 2-3 to Boro's B Team (give or take a few subs) in the Carabeano Cup (or whatever they call it these days), the two bottom clubs in the fledgling Chumpionship table play each other for their first shot at some points in The Yorkshire League.

So can we go up to the Land of the Long White Smog this weekend and come back with something? Boro certainly didn't build on their win v our lot and whilst I didn't see that game, we played better against Leicester than we did against Plymouth (well, for 5 minutes v Plymouth in particular) and Warnock has also yet another reason to go and get a result against one of his former teams that he rarely loses to.

So has owt much changed since we last played? Answers on the back of a tenner addressed to me if you don't mind.

On the tellybox
Not showing anywhere at the moment other than iFollow if you're in furrin lands. Of course, it will be on t'interweb somewhere as the EFL whack-a-mole policy continues to cost them money for what they set up to fail in the first place.

Pies, pees and pints

As always - I'll defer to them as 'ave done it already

https://footballgroundguide.com/leagues/england/championship/riverside-stadium-middlesbrough.html

Latest news

Boro have supposedly sold Chumba Wumba Akpom to some furriners, awaiting confirmation as to whether it's gone through but he hasn't kicked a ball in anger for them this season so hard to work out whether that'sgood for us or not. Apparently he's gone to Ajax. Just waiting for our roving reporters, Del Boy and Rodders to confirm.

That's confirmed it then.

They've also brought two lads in, I might mention them later. Our roving reporter Snoots has been all over this all week like a rash. Whether or not he's got a rash we'll have to ask AmChaff to answer, but then again, she might not be too bothered to look.

Meanwhile in the last few minutes hour or so, Town have confirmed weve signed Delano Burgzorg from Mainz on loan for a season. Hope he's not going to moan about the lack of bread shops on the corner of the street. Then again he's Dutch, so er, shouldn't have any problems finding the other produce normally available on the corner of the streets. Whistle

er, Ajax?

https://www.htafc.com/news/2023/august/delano-burgzorg-agrees-loan-from-mainz/

Otherwise bargains galore to be had at Wilko's. Wonder if our scouts have been looking, thinking they could find a footballer somewhere in amongst the plant stands? They've previous for finding plant stands in the past they thought were footballers.

For some reason we want to revert to the old Academy model, where we get all the local kids that Citeh, Man U, Liverpool, Burnalee (these days) and that other lot up the A62 haven't signed up and try and find one we can sell for 10 bob before his 16th birthday. Why? We seem to be doing far better with the current model. It's not as good as Brighton's model but they don't seem to be trying to fight the Larndan club's plundering of their local yoof either. They are just a tad more succesful in turning £1-5m Citeh rejects into £100m+ Chelsea signings than we are at the moment.

Out Injured/Suspended/Isolating

Not aware of any changes here - tell a lie, recently confirmed fit and a scorer of a B Team goal, Kieran Phillips, is injured again. One less for me to count in our P4P so far.

Back training but not oven ready/Back in the frame

Ummm, Turton is back up to walking speed apparently. He might still be faster than some of our current back 3 or 4.

Last time out

Boro got battered by the boys from the Binley Mega Chippy (it was an interweb thing for a while) (https://www.tiktok.com/@thefakeherefordian/video/7104308553363508486?lang=en - it would never have got on Top of the Pops). On their first day out they were well and truly pie and mashed by the slimy eels that swim off Millwall docks on their home debut. Town fared little better in a game of bowls on Plymouth Hoe and got Salt'n'Vinegared by the lads from the Leicester crisp factory at home last weekend. Snooker Loopied by a shot rammed into the pocket between the heels of Town keeper Nicholls that Wilie Thorne would have been proud of.

Musical Interlude

See page 1 - I've done it once, I don't see the need to do it again ... oh hang on

Whitby-born Arthur Brown is know for his theatrical performances and eccentric music.

He created the rock group The Crazy World of Arthur Brown- the original band also included Vincent Crane, Drachen Theaker and Nick Greenwood.

That'll do for the Cultural Corner from North Yorkshire, it may have been done before Whistle

The Sack Race

If I didn't mention the Wolveramptongoround last time, well I won't really bother too much this time either. Furrin bloke was in charge - toys thrown out of the pram at a lack of transfer action (good job he wasn't with us then), bloke that was at Bornmuff now in charge in case you missed it. Then they were robbed of a blatant penalty by VAR t'other night in Mancland. Even t'refs watching said so. Laugh

Good job we don't have VAR so decisions like that can never work against us aye it?

Oh, wait!!

Tables, Form

I may have mentioned our relative positions. We've both got form for being down here from this time last season when some bloke you might know was in charge at Boro, and then they set on the bloke we should have done and we set on the dumb Jock who could piss off a whole country just by opening his bedroom door. You know how the rest worked out.

Innies and Outies

One of 'em sounds like a hot milky coffee. Are they sure that's what they call him?

Who's banging 'em in

Well it ain't Chumba Wumba Akpom as he's not kicked a ball in anger and is off to furrin lands. I may have mentioned it.

Top scorer same as last time, they were nilled at Coventry. I mentioned it if you were paying attention.

They can't all lose

It's a bit early to be on the old conveyor belt, but let's see who's likely getting the cuddly toys and who's going home with a Goblin teas-made and a set of drinking glasses that Esso don't give away any more.

We've played 'em before

We're one game worse off than last time - apart from that, we need a win.

Next up?

Norwich at home next Saturday.
Gegen-pressing's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming home, Gegen-pressing's coming home Thumb up

Pressers

Colin's kind words. Or Warnock's wind-up depending on which way you look at it.

https://www.htafc.com/news/2023/august/neil-warnock-previews-middlesbrough-a/

If you can't be arsed to read and watch, just watch

Peo's point of view on Radio Local

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0g78w6j

The view from the Transporter Bridge. (Like most of the rides at Flamingoland this month, its shut).

https://www.mfc.co.uk/news/2023/august/17/michael-carrick-pre-match--huddersfield-town/

Meawhile back down at the Crooked House, or the remaining rubble that hasn't yet been pilferred and put on eBay or Faceache Market Place.

The saga continues with the fire raisers, sorry, new owners, not only having previous of destroying pubs but also setting fire to equipment on recently bought land-fill sites. Nobody's got done for that yet either. How are these two getting away with it? Answers on a post card to

Plod,
CID Division,
Thick as 2 Short Planks Lane,
Rightunderyoureffingnoseville.
YU2 R a joke

RE: Town v Smoggies v Town - Double Header - August 2023 - ritchiebaby - 17-08-2023

You've gone on a bit of a ramble there, theo, but still managed to talk a lot of sense.

Aunt Fanny's Shack must be for standing room only.