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The Off Topic Thread - Printable Version

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RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-03-2020

Vegetarian is an old Indian word. Originally, it means “a bad hunter”.

DD Confused Confused


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-03-2020

I`ve started stockpiling Bidet`s.

I`ll make a fortune when the toilet paper runs out.

DD Cool Cool


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-03-2020

I saw an expiration date on a tub anti-aging cream. Now that’s just a scam!

DD Blush Blush


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-03-2020

Son: “Am I adopted?”
-
Me: “Not yet, it seems nobody is interested.“

DD Big Grin Big Grin


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2020

I fell asleep in the chair earlier, and when i woke up someone had put a teabag in my mouth.

I`m not happy.

I hate being taken for a mug.

DD Cool Cool


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2020

Don`t forget the clocks go forward at 2 AM on 29th March.

So we get 1 hour less rain that day.

DD Doh Doh


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2020

Even after all these years my G/F still thinks I`m sexy.

Every time I walk past she says "What an ass"..

DD Big Grin Big Grin


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2020

I told my boss I needed a raise, and that 3 other companies were after me.

He said "Which companies"?

I replied "Gas, electric and water".

DD Whistle Whistle


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2020

*****BREAKING NEWS! *****

Sadly news has just reached me saying that the first member of my Facebook friends has sadly died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1500 cans of assorted food, 100kg of pasta, 75kg of rice, 2000 toilet rolls and 300L of hand sanitiser which he had panic bought from Aldi “just in case!”

The whole lot collapsed and buried the silly devil !

DD Laugh Laugh


RE: The Off Topic Thread - drewks - 12-03-2020

I'm giving up drinking for a month.

... sorry, that came out wrong -

I'm giving up.
Drinking for a month.