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The Off Topic Thread - Printable Version

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RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 29-01-2020

My G/F told me today that some days, i can be a total bastard
I've chosen mondays and wednesdays.

DD Cool Cool


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 30-01-2020

Autocorrect sucks! Look what I've sent to somebody in the office by mistake...
- "Next Tuesday I'll lick you, suck you and bite you all night!"

- Hahahaha, what did you want to say?

- Thursday

DD Dodgy Dodgy


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 31-01-2020

Have you been the victim of faulty double glazing??

You could be entitled to condensation.

On Monday we start Diarrhea awareness week.

Runs until Friday.

DD Doh Doh


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 01-02-2020

Anyone ever notice the word Saturday has the word "turd" in it?

Sorry, that's a shit joke.

DD Doh Doh


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Salopbaggie - 01-02-2020

A Russian female weight-lifter goes to the doctors and tells him "Doctor, I have been taking steroids and have grown a dick".

"Anobolic" the doctor asked. "No, just a dick" she replies."


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Amelia Chaffinch - 02-02-2020

Just sung The Lord's my shepherd at this morning's service.


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 03-02-2020

The G/F was cleaning the other day whilst I was watching the Villa match. She dusted the top of the TV and F Me, Jack Grealish fell over.

DD Rolleyes Rolleyes


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 04-02-2020

The G/F said she wanted Chanel No5 for her birthday this year.

She`s going to be really happy.

All I had to to was retune her Freeview box.

DD Whistle Whistle


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 05-02-2020

I once lived just a stone`s throw away from a family who all died from mysterious head injuries.

DD Confused Confused


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Stairs - 05-02-2020

Did you know that 97% of the world population are stupid?

Luckily I am in the other 5%