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+----- Thread: Not The Town O'Clock News (/showthread.php?tid=358)
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RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - theo_luddite - 22-05-2025
Not football news at all but likely coming to a Ryanair flight near you soon. If it was April 1st I'd take it for the joke it surely is but seriously? Standing for 4 hours on a flight to Tenerife. Oh yes, that Irish prat would make you do it. I wouldn't put it passed him charging you extra for the, erm, privelege? After all, you don't have to stand up to try and crawl all over your fellow passengers to go to the loo. £1 or €1 to use those too no doubt.
https://www.examinerlive.co.uk/news/uk-world-news/new-pictures-show-standing-only-31701049?int_source=nba
PS I've mispelled prat, but it rhymes with prat. Think you two can work it out.
Otherwise, in case you're looking for that special present for your other half's highly significant birthday that's coming up soon, or better still a Wedding Anniversary that simply can't be missed ....
https://officialcarmats.co.uk/collections/huddersfield-town-car-mats
Well, why wouldn't you?
You won't find these in the Town shops.
Already got mine, but I'm single and loving it.
Right what we got today then?
Well, we got some half-priced cracked ice
Miles and miles of carpet tiles
TV's
Deep-freeze
Them David Bowie's LPs
Ball games
Gold chains
What's-names
And at a push
Some Trevor Francis tracksuits from a mush in Shepherds Bush
Bush, bush, bush, bush, bush, bush, bush
No income tax, no V.A.T
No money back, no guarantee
Black or white
Rich or broke
We'll cut prices at a stroke
God bless Hooky Street
Viva Hooky Street
Long live Hooky Street
C'est magnifique Hooky Street
Magnifique Hooky Street (two for a pound)
Hooky Street
Hooky Street (three for a fiver come on)
Honestly, these are not duff stuff from some 42 carat plonker Rodney. They are genuine, licensed, official car mats as sold on Chorley market for nearly 30 years.
All you need to do is to buy a dodgy 2nd hand car from Boycey to put them in first .... and then maybe get a hug and a kiss from Marlene. What could possibly go wrong?
No, ................ I don't know any cheap divorce lawyers.
Why are you asking?
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - Lord Snooty - 22-05-2025
Gerry Murphy has passed away.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - Lord Snooty - 24-05-2025
Another one gone. Ex Town and Wolves keeper Gary Pierce, aged 74.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - theo_luddite - 24-05-2025
Dropping like flies now but no great surprise given their (and to some extent our) ages.
See the Blunts still don't do Wembley finals.
I thought that made it 5, but maybe that's just the more recent version of Wembley.
According to the Beeb Beeb Ceeb website ...
"That’s 10 attempts to traverse the end-of-season tightrope, and 10 topples over the edge - not to mention the meter still running on 100 years without a win at Wembley. They must be cursed."
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - Lord Snooty - 01-06-2025
Peter Clarke is still playing at 43 years old. He's just signed for Prescot Cables FC in the Northern Premier League.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - theo_luddite - 01-06-2025
A real box to box defender - 6yd box to 18yd box these days.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - theo_luddite - 06-06-2025
Well, there's manager's/head coaches been sacked for their club getting relegated. Sacked for their club not reaching the play offs. Sacked because your at Watford, what do you expect? Sacked because they lost in the play offs.
Then Spurs step up to the plate. The richest club that generally wins bugger all because they won't push the boat out, no matter which manager they bring in. They sack their manager for winning their first trophy in 17 seasons and guaranteed European football again next season. But no, their league position wasn't where they think they have a right to be. So off he goes.
Remind me again how many Prima Donna clubs won anything again last season.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - theo_luddite - 06-06-2025
Ozzy the bull has escaped from New Street Station in Brum
Didn't think he was a Blue Nose though.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - Amelia Chaffinch - 06-06-2025
He's the lucky one. He's off to the sanctuary now.
RE: Not The Town O'Clock News - theo_luddite - 09-06-2025
Barry, Barry, Barry Horne on R5 Live doing the punditry for tonight's Belgian Chocolateers v Welsh Wales clash.
Sorba the (well known Larndan born) Taff is in the starting line-up for Welsh Wales.